31 December, 2014

Last class of the year

Today was vinyasa with Cobey Mandarino at Shakti.

The last class of 2014. I believe I kept up my writing this year, as compared to 2013 when I had a big lull of not making any yoga blog entries. Strangely, that feels like it was this year, but the archive suggests otherwise. There was a lot of travel, and a lot of home practice.

But if you can believe the numbers, it looks like I did about 231 classes (since today's wasn't included in the count). That's an average of 4-5 days per week. Not too shabby.

Today's class with Cobey was great. In fact, the last 3 classes I've taken have been great. I've found myself more willing and able to focus and do the practice than I have in a long time. Not sure what's different about me? The studio? I wouldn't say that I'm particularly positive these days, in my usual holiday funk, but there's something to be said...

So what will 2015 look like?

Living in a new place, and working on new projects at work. Lots has changed, and I guess that's the norm for me. Varying degrees of constant change. I hesitate to look at the list above and say that I should be doing more yoga than I did. But I would like to be doing better yoga than I did for some of this year. I don't think my practice is presently at its strongest. Well, actually, in the immediate recent past, it's been great. But this year it took a bit of a backseat to all the travel. I'll probably be traveling less, or at least less extremely in 2015.

Okay. Enough philosophizing about future and past.

30 December, 2014

Nothing lasts forever

Today was vinyasa with Chelle.

Yesterday I got the news that my brother needed to have cardiac bypass surgery. It was not deemed to be an emergency, in the sense that he didn't have a heart attack or anything. But they decided to do it immediately, and that meant today. My brother will be 65 years old this year. That alone is hard to really absorb. It is an age that I can remember my dad being. In fact, when my father was 65, let's see... that would be in 1990. So I was 22. The math adds up to one truth. We're all getting older.

I didn't really stop for long to consider the fact that my brother could die, because I actually had been slightly misinformed about the severity of the procedure until after it was already done. And he didn't die. But he will someday. My mother did. My sister did. My father will (though he will probably live to be 150). And, eventually (hopefully later, rather than sooner), I will.

Nothing and no one lasts forever.

I took that with me to practice today.

Though I took class at the studio yesterday, and plan to do so tomorrow, and I could have easily decided that today would be a home practice, or no practice, I decided that today was as good a day as any to show up on my mat and do whatever I can do to keep my body and mind healthy, in the hopes that the later, rather than sooner, will be the outcome for me. Thinking about "The Big Picture," I found it surprisingly easy today to maintain focus and intensity through the entire class, and not get angry or frustrated at the long poses, or the fact that my arms and legs were burning. Because burning is not bad. It is uncomfortable, but temporary. And enduring it always brings about some positive inner change. As does learning which instructions to heed and not to heed. Today, "Go deeper into your lunge" was a "No" for me. And it was not because I can't. And not because I don't want to. It was because, right now, I shouldn't. My hip has told me this, and so I listen.

I don't mean to be morbid here, with the "death talk," though I do tend to become so at this time each year. But it's really hard to fathom that end that will surely come. I live each day, often wasting massive amounts of time, completely repressing the inevitable fact of how the time we have is finite. And even when I do start to think about that fact, I still don't know the right answer to the question "So, then what should I be doing with the time I have?" Today in yoga, Chelle read from Melody Beattie's book, and there was a bit about the reason we are here is to find and bring joy and compassion. But that's a kind of religion, in and of itself, right? It's a belief system. It's an Eastern belief system. I like that belief system. But it still doesn't tell me what I should be doing. I don't know should I be working at Google? Should I be living a simple life in the forest and eating berries? Should I be "living life to the fullest" and going on epic adventures, brushing up against the limits of both the physical and emotional worlds? What should I be doing?

I still don't know (yet).

But I know that showing up on my mat is not heading in the wrong direction.

29 December, 2014

About as good as it can feel

Tonight was Forrest Yoga with Zak at Shakti.

I thought I was doing Prana Flow. Turns out I was doing Forrest Yoga. Shows how much I know, right? The schedule lied, because Zak was substituting for Tara tonight. So now I know what Forrest Yoga is like, and I still need to find out what Prana Flow is like.

The class was super mellow, but deep. I was very cautious of my hip, not to grind into it or go too far. I think I have been mistaking "going deep" with "dumping into the hip" and it's been at least partially responsible for this discomfort that I am now working through.

As always, Zak's classes are peaceful and uplifting.

After class, I felt like I was floating on a cloud. It was very cold today, and the walk to the studio was chilling. But the walk back to the car after practice was refreshing. The same air. The only thing that changed was me.

Today I felt good to get work done. There are some things that have been looming over me. I have not felt productive for some time now. I have probably been productive in different ways (again, the being awfully hard on myself), but there are certain types of output that I feel I need to deliver to be doing my job to the fullest. Today I made reasonable progress toward one of those goals. I had even scheduled for myself a little time-wasting event. I told myself "You can look at X, once you get to such and such a point in the progress." As the day went on, I decided never to go look at X. I actually passed up the time-wastage gift that I had promised myself.

So perhaps, as the new year cusps, I am about to ricochet out of my end-of-year funk that seems to happen every year around this time. In fact, if I go back and look at this day last year or the year before, I bet I know what I'll see...

Addendum, and case in point:

"My focus on the mat has been decent lately. But I have been scattered at work. All over the place. Maybe I am being hard on myself. It is the holidays. But I feel like I don't stay on task for more than a few moments before wandering to something more compelling, whatever it may be."

That was December 28, 2013. Of course, that statement would probably also be applicable on 250 out of the 365 days of the year, but we'll pretend that's not the case.

27 December, 2014

Skimming the surface

Today was vinyasa with April Sargent at Shakti.

I've started this entry twice. Deleted everything I wrote. Then I undeleted it. Wrote some more. Then deleted it again. I've been struggling lately. I don't know how long "lately" is, and I don't know if it's just the combination of moving to a new place, changing projects at work, and the joy of the holidays, or if it's a true backslide on being present. Perhaps those are one and the same.

Let me tell you a couple of stories, and this time, from here forward, there will be no deleting and undeleting.

I cautiously volunteered to participate in a personal growth workshop that takes place online, once a week. It's being hosted by a good friend of mine, and we'd been discussing it for a long time. I had been hesitant, because I wasn't sure I could make the commitment, and I don't like making commitments that I can't keep. But I finally decided to do it. The challenge, aside from attending something for 16 weeks at the same time, is that the time was 7am on Sundays. The reason for the time is that it's actually taking place 10am Eastern Time, and it needed to be at a time that would support having participants on the other side of the globe. I am not a morning person. We've only had 5 sessions, and I have missed two of them. For the ones that I have attended, I have mostly been in a half-awake fog, and not participated much. People often share their feelings. If you know me, even from here, you know that I am not typically an "under-sharer." But I have mostly sat silent. It hasn't helped that I've had a little bit of stress and strife that has coincidentally fallen the evening before 2 of the 3 sessions I have attended, leading me to further withdraw into a shell. It's the opposite of what I should be doing (I hate using the word "should" but I think the point of participating in such things is to participate, not just be a fly on the wall).

After last week's missed meeting, I felt a bit of shame, since I have, in fact, failed to uphold the commitment, which is exactly what I was worried about when I committed. Since it's my friend who is the leader, I feel like I am letting her down, and I am sure this is my thing, and she isn't upset with me at all. I am sure she understands. But for me, I just feel like it's "excuses, excuses, excuses," and that this inability to "show up" is somehow representative of the rut I am actually in, which perhaps goes deeper than I even realize.

These are the thoughts.

Having started doing yoga at a studio again, I am realizing just how much the "home practice" had been "phoning it in," rather than going deep. There were times where I had much distraction. There were times where I went through the motions, doing the amount of yoga posing that enabled me to tell myself that I am not blowing off yoga. But what's that proving?

Time out here to say that I recognize I'm being awfully hard on myself.

So, story number two. Recently, and for some time, I had been trying to encourage my girlfriend to get involved in something that I thought would be beneficial to her. I had patiently suggested it, time and time again. Then, today, she mentioned to me that she was interested to pursue said thing. And, for reasons completely baffling to me, I reacted in a way that served as discouragement. It wasn't that I intentionally discouraged her. It wasn't that I changed my mind. It was just a sort of half-attentive, reactive response where I found some reason why it wasn't a good idea. Fact is, I had only meant that it wasn't a good idea right now but it was perceived as flat-out discouragement, and then a series of negative consequences have precipitated and piled on top of that for the last 24 hours. So there's that. The big picture version of that appears to be that I am not the most fantastic of communicators. I don't always listen well, and I also don't always say things that are very well thought out, particularly if I am preoccupied with something. The result is that I give the impression of being full of contradictions. When these apparent contradictions are pointed out, I usually find myself explaining that there's no contradiction at all. But the reason why there appears to be one is because some of my communications are more reliable than others, and they are all received at face value as being of equal importance. This is something I need to work on, I guess...

Back to Story #1. This morning, I finally did manage to wake my ass up for the weekly workshop that I have such difficulty attending. I hadn't slept well all night, partly because of being still in a new unfamiliar place, and partly because I don't sleep well when I know I need to wake up abnormally early, because I subconsciously worry about oversleeping. So, when I woke up, I decided "This is it. I am not doing this workshop anymore. I just can't do it. I am not awake enough to participate, and I guess now's just not a good time." I proceeded to write a fairly lengthy message to my friend, explaining to her why I was not going to attend. But then I decided not to press "Send." I decided, I should at least have the decency to show up and discuss these feelings I am having, and at least say, to the group, "I don't know if I can do this." Ironically, I was actually wide awake by this point, so there had ceased to be a good reason not to attend other than the resistance (which I believe my actually underlie the entire problem with going, and be related to my "stuckness" in other places in my life). So I went online to join the meeting, and I discovered that there is no meeting this week. It had been unscheduled because of the holidays. I would have known this had I remembered, and I would have been reminded had I attended last week.

Story #3, which isn't really a story, but actually is just the facts of the yoga practice: Today's practice with April was quite good. It was difficult, but manageable. I am having some issues with my right hip joint. I wouldn't go so far as to say that I am injured, but I think I have gone a little too deep, too quickly, in this re-engagement with hot yoga and long classes, and it's causing quite a bit of deep aching.

That's enough for one day.

26 December, 2014

Bare minima

Today was home practice.

I had the day off today. I had all day to do yoga. I had said that I would cook dinner tonight. For some reason, I stalled, and let the day fritter away to the point that it was time for dinner, but I still hadn't done yoga. I don't know if this was procrastination, or getting absorbed in the moment, or not taking commitments seriously, or what. But I felt a little badly about it, because if you say you're going to make dinner, it's best not to make people wait for it.

The last couple of days, I have had "Obsession du Jour." One night, I spent 3 hours researching home security systems (don't even think about breaking in, because I have a robotic Doberman, 8 motion sensors, a central alarm that rings Homeland Security, and a siren that is loud enough to shatter your eardrums... or do I? Don't test me...). The next day, I spent hours researching acoustic treatment for home recording studios. What's that, you ask? It's a million different kinds of foam you can put on your walls so that the sound coming out of your speakers is accurate, and not victim of echo or reflections or resonances in the room. Boring. But I still managed to spend hours researching it.

When I start ratholing on things like this it is usually a sign that something's rotten in the State of Denmark. This is how I withdraw from normal life. Well, it's one of the ways. Sometimes, I would withdraw into various types of addiction like online gaming of various sorts. Other times, it's these types of obsessive research projects. Guitar amplifier repair... Vacuum tubes... Aquariums... When I get engrossed in them, they become the most important thing.

I wouldn't be surprised if someone told me that these things tend to ramp up during the dark and depressing times of year.

All that said, today I did a rather minimal practice. It was probably about 30 minutes. It was one of those "How much yoga must I do for me to feel like I have done an acceptable practice?" That would be 3 Sun A, 3 Sun B, Crescent Lunge, Open Twist, Side Angle, Eagle, Tree, Triangle, Bridge, Pigeon. That would be the series of poses that I deem "bare minimum acceptable yoga practice for me to not feel like I have flat-out shirked."

But where was my head during this? It's interesting. I've grown pretty good at keeping the breath going, even if my head is off in lalaland. Yeah. As long as that breath is going, I'm "present," right? Um, not so much.

I recognize I'm being hard on myself again. Believe me, I recognize it.

24 December, 2014

The long awaited Lisa Black yoga class

Today was vinyasa with Lisa Black, at Shakti Vinyasa.

I started practicing yoga a little over 3 years ago. It's hard to believe that much time has passed. Ever since I first practiced, I would hear the more experienced yogis and instructors around town mention the name Lisa Black, since she was the one who pioneered "Power Yoga" in Seattle back in 2003 (I learned this when chatting with her after class today). Shakti Vinyasa, in Ballard, was the first studio of its kind in the area, and it set the stage for what is now a rather extensive network of such studios.

I'd never before gone to Shakti because it was out of my way, so I'd never taken her class, even though it was always here for the taking. But I had always been curious to experience the teaching of someone whose name is, in Seattle yoga anyway, almost as well-known as Baron Baptiste himself.

So today, being a holiday, offered me the chance to attend her noon class (the only one she currently teaches in the Seattle studio). It was the most crowded class I've taken yet at Shakti, but it was still not very crowded compared to what I routinely experienced at other studios I've frequented. There were about 30 students in class.

The class was great. The class was difficult. And the class was very much what I would hope for and expect from someone who has earned the reputation she has earned. Her teaching is essential, without unnecessary words and banter. And her tone and encouragement made me want to do even the things that I didn't really feel like doing (but not Wheel, since I'm still nursing the sore wrists!).

Looking forward to more of this studio, and to experiencing the other teachers.

23 December, 2014

Benefits of a studio practice

Today was vinyasa with Chelle.

I don't think it is really possible for me to get the same benefit from a home practice as from practicing in a good studio with a good teacher. That's a bold statement. It is not meant to take anything away from the commitment that has been involved in making myself roll out the mat so many times in so many places to embark on a solo practice. But there's something to be said for a teacher standing in front of you, and pushing you to your edge. The teacher isn't even necessarily the one defining what that edge is. But the environment is one in which I, for one, find it easier to seek that edge. In the home practice, there are a lot of distractions.

Chelle's definitely one of the toughest teachers I've had, but it is an extremely sensible toughness. It's not a class that hits you with a sledgehammer and makes you want to just give up and go to Child's Pose. It's a class that sets cruise control at "The Edge" and somehow makes you want to stay in it.

I think that the practicing that I do in a studio, with an instructor, will likely keep me more on track with some of the goals I have for my personal growth, than to resort only to home practices. That's part of the reason I decided to start another membership. I need the guidance. It's not the community I need. It's the teacher. I don't reject community, but it ultimately is not the reason I show up.

21 December, 2014

What a difference a couple of days can make

Today was vinyasa with Rob.

It was a different experience than 2 days earlier. I didn't feel fabulous, but I felt a million times better than the previous class. It was not an easy class, but it was a very standard Baptiste, down to every last pose. There was one point during class where we were doing Dancer's Pose, and Rob said that there came a time when he learned that the balancing poses are not about standing on one foot. They're about being okay with wherever you are right now. That reminded me of the other day when I was berating myself for the inability to balance. And getting super-negative on myself. So I guess that means that I don't give myself a lot of kindness. When I'm not where I want to be, I am brutal. I used to be that way to others. I've become much better at not doing that. But it is harder to manage that with myself.

And that's why I keep showing up.

19 December, 2014

Everything hurts

Today was vinyasa with Chelle.

Maybe it's because I traveled this week, or because I recently increased the number of longer classes I've been taking, but everything hurt today and nothing felt particularly good. My wrists were aching the entire class, and all of the deep lunges felt like nothing in my hips wanted to cooperate. And there was so much fatigue in my legs, it was hard to even stay in the poses. To make matters worse, I was teetering on the edge of foot cramps the entire class, and not from any particularly severe heat in the room. I must have just shown up dehydrated.

But this is not "the norm." Just last week I had a great class. It's important to remember that this is temporary. But it's difficult to remember. Near the end of class, we were asked to do Dancer's Pose, and I found it very hard to balance at all. I started to get mad at myself and had the negative thoughts and dissatisfaction with myself. As I felt more and more exhausted from the long time spent in poses, I even felt myself getting angry at Chelle. But not particularly angry. This is all familiar. This has all happened before.

The body ebbs and flows, and it's hard to flow when you're ebbing.

18 December, 2014

Squeezing in a gentle practice

Today was a short and gentle practice at the hotel.

I did this one in the morning before checking out of the hotel. I knew there would be almost no other opportunity to do it, and didn't want to take two days off in a row, if not necessary. That's one of my general guidelines that I am mostly able to accomplish.

I didn't have a lot of time, and my wrists are still aching a lot. I did about 30 minutes of nothing that involved bearing weight on the palms. Stretches, close to the floor. That was about it. I felt like it was a reasonably focused practice, even though it was very gentle. There's a part of me that always feels like, if I don't do 3 Sun A and 3 Sun B, then I haven't done yoga.

But that's crazy talk.

16 December, 2014

San Francisco practice

Today was hotel yoga.

I don't remember much about it. There was a basic flow. It covered all the main points, but probably only lasted 25-30 minutes. I slipped a bit this week with the writing, and that's why I remember nothing.

14 December, 2014

About as sore as sore can get

Today was home practice.

There was Friday's class, and then there was shoveling, cleaning gutters, and various other activities this weekend that pretty much has my body aching all over, with my wrists being the most severe. There were Chatturangas in this practice because my wrists were screaming even from Cat/Cow. So it was a lot of deep stretching, and breathing.

This weekend was the first of the home projects that involved getting dirty and figuring things out. I got on a ladder. I used a shovel. I went to a hardware store. Almost like a normal person!

Along with home projects comes the constant need to recognize that there is no perfect, and that there is no done. It's an ongoing process, and a continuous stream of compromises. Turning over the soil unearths things that are not seen, and not all of them are good. In that sense, working on an old house is not much different from working on oneself. In fact, the combination of the two will undoubtedly bring about a never-ending stream of parallels.

But I guess if you're looking, those parallels exist everywhere we put our focus.

I could say a lot more about it, and I suspect I will.

12 December, 2014

Moving in a direction

Today was vinyasa yoga with Zak Endicott at Shakti Vinyasa Yoga.

Below was a voice recording that I converted into text right after the class. Sort of a stream of consciousness. I now know why it's better to write instead of speak for certain things. Ramble, ramble, ramble.

This is probably my first time taking class with Zak in maybe 2 years since just before he left Be Luminous, and it was really a fantastic class... probably one of the best classes I can remember taking. The studio was peaceful and quiet. Even though it was a Friday evening at 5:45 there were only 12 people or so in the class. The energy was just really good. Quiet music, or no music at all. The inspiring positive energy of Zak's teaching and though, the class was actually quite difficult, it was very, very focused and relaxing, and I felt like even though I was being pushed to my limit that I was going to do everything that he said to do, in a safe way, and it was going to feel good. I just found myself very able to stay focused on the moment. This class, though it was just one class, probably sealed the deal for me in terms of wanting to become a member of the studio... so it seems like that's what I'm going to do. It was nice to feel centered in a class, and to feel completely focused. It's been a long time since I've actually felt that, so just enjoying the experience and looking forward to it again.

10 December, 2014

To-do lists

Today was home practice.

It was a reasonably garden-variety practice, with Baptiste flow, maybe 30-35 minutes. I am surprised how much I felt the effects of yesterday's class. Though it was a gentle flow, I felt sore in places I normally do not, probably due to how deep we went.

This week I was trying to find a decent to-do list app. Because there are lots of to-dos when one moves to a new house. Rather, an old house. And, as you all know, the to-dos are wont to creep into the mind when on the yoga mat. As soon as we take away the noisy distractions of the day, to the calm of the mat, we create our own simulated noise with the to-do lists. Practicing in an old house, it's easy to get caught up in them, because looking around the room I can see them... need the quarter-round moldings for the floors... wonder if I could do those myself? would need a miter saw... would need to do a good job on the corners... maybe it's better to let someone else do it... need to buy weather-stripping for the front door, since the heat keeps coming on every 10 minutes... need to deal with the earth-to-wood contact around the exterior of the house since it's raining so much... and how much gravel would we need, anyway, to do that? Will we need to have it delivered? Or could we just get it in my car?

Those are the lists. And there will always be lists. It doesn't matter whether it's an old house or a new house or a red house or a blue house or a cardboard box. There will always be things to take the mind away from the boring simplicity of the breath and the body.

But, nonetheless, we practice.

09 December, 2014

New beginnings

Today was Gentle Flow with Chelle Swierz at Shakti Vinyasa Yoga.

My first yoga class as a Ballard resident. My first time at Shakti. But not my first class with Chelle. I decided that it would be nice to have one thing comfortable in the equation. It's a really nice studio, and I felt very much at home there. It's got a distinctly different vibe than the other places I've frequented. I could see myself becoming a member here? But I will take it slow and try out a few different teachers and classes before deciding whether to commit to a single studio again.

The class was 90 minutes, and it really went deep into the hips (at my request, actually), with far more variations of Lizard pose than one could imagine, spending maybe 15 to 20 minutes on those hip openers. It was good, and intense, and peaceful.

It's interesting knowing that this could become my home studio, and be part of the experience of being in a new place.

07 December, 2014

Letting go means letting go

Today was home practice.

A thought popped into my head today. Before I could edit it, I acted on it. And it was moderately innocuous. Nonetheless, it stirred up the mud at the bottom of the river, and now the snow globe is snowing. Light snow, no accumulation, set to taper by morning. But it was still an act that came from not thinking things through and not letting go fully of things. That's where the head is right now.

I missed a few days of writing, which I must backfill to get things up to date. That may be part of why these things happen. But maybe not.

Today was a very stiff day. My wrists hurt a lot, probably from the Friday class I haven't told you about yet. And my right hip was very stiff. I decided to do a very short, mellow class, focused on nothing but what my body needed. Low back extension, side bends, some hamstring opening, hip opening. Not much else. There was limited time since we just moved. But it was necessary to hold that commitment to myself to do the practice today, even if abbreviated.

There are things one must keep as commitments.

05 December, 2014

More things come to a close

Today was vinyasa with Ara Gibson, at Live Love Flow.

I have 2 days left on my 10-class pass at the studio. But I have only 1 night left of living in the neighborhood. I suppose I'll find a way to use up those last two classes, and it wouldn't be a crisis if I never do. I still have who-knows-how-many classes on a pass at Urban Yoga Spa that I could use, or maybe it's expired? I don't know.

It was a 75 minute class, and it was hot yoga, but it was not too much. The intensity was not overwhelming. She actually was pretty easy on us as things turned out.

It occurred to me this weekend that I have become a part of communities, and then departed those communities several times now. It's something about "belonging." Not sure what it is. I toy with the idea of belonging, but then I ultimately withdraw from it. It's not that I don't want connection, because I do. But I think that the connections that persist for me tend to be one-to-one, not one-to-many. The curiosity, I suppose, is why I keep toying with the idea of community. Almost like looking for a religion but repeatedly deciding against.

I never really became a part of the Live Love Flow community. I am not sure if there is one. I've never felt like it. There was something much more family-like at Urban and at Be Luminous.

What will be my next dabbling with community?

04 December, 2014

Filling in the blanks #2

Today was a home practice.

I did it without videos or anything. A basic Baptiste-like flow. Probably about 40 minutes. It was a few days ago now, and I can't remember it, actually, so all I can tell you is that I did it. The failure to write about it that night reflects the degree to which we have been busy getting ready for "The Big Move" to happen on Saturday. But that's not a good excuse, I don't think. There is always 5 minutes to keep a commitment to oneself and make it a real commitment. Now, I write 3 days later, and I have no recollection of what I felt in that moment. I can tell you a ton about what I feel now, but that's not what the purpose of this blog is.

It's a bit absurd to chastise myself here, but we're being honest.

02 December, 2014

Filling in the Blanks #1

Today was home practice.

I know it was rushed, because I was getting ready to take a flight to San Francisco. But that was like 5 days ago now, so "The moment is lost," so to speak.

I can't really remember anything, and I won't fluff it up and just ramble about whatever to feel like I've got more than 4 sentences.

Or maybe I will.

01 December, 2014

Two roads diverged

Today was home practice with Bryan Jones.

Another decent class from this guy. This one was pretty intense, and a little bit fast at times, but he was trying to create a lot of heat in a short amount of time, and it was actually pretty fun.

My hips have become quite tight. Not sure if it's because I stopped doing hot yoga, or because I haven't been doing classes that are as long or intense, or because of the weather, or because of stress. It could be any or all of those things, but for sure, I feel stiffness in my hip flexors in a way that feels like I have been set back or set into a different state than my body has been for most of the time that I have practiced yoga.

So today would have been the day that I was flying to Munich again. It would have been a 12 day trip that I had strategically crafted to take me and my colleague from Munich to London to New York. It was a world tour, and sounded so exciting, but also exhausting. But the trip turned out not to be, because of my change of projects, and my home purchase. So instead I did yoga, while my colleague(s) sit on British Airways Flight 48 (or maybe it's Flight 49). In fact, I think I might have heard it fly overhead just now. Nope. I'm wrong. It left at 5:57pm So it's somewhere over Canada right now.

It's odd to feel regret and relief at the same time. Sorry to miss the adventure, but so glad that I don't need to endure it.

Now, if only I can figure out how to get back into those hips again...