31 January, 2014

Pleasant surprises

Today was vinyasa with JESSICA WILLIS!!

I decided to head to the 4pm class today, after a long week, wanting to start my Friday evening early. And I was surprised and excited to see a familiar face who left us for NYC. It was nice to have this class today. It was really difficult, and I can't even say that I enjoyed *the yoga*, in fact, I really ende dup winding down and doing my own thing for the last 15 minutes of class. But what I did enjoy was seeing Jessica at Be Luminous. I don't know her that well, but there is always something special when people "come back." Maybe I am sentimental.

Feeling the pressure lately, again, of the things to come at work. Nobody is pounding on the door saying "Do More!" but I still feel like I should be doing more, and that what I am doing is not happening fast enough. So I worry. I worry about the future. I worry about will I be good enough. I worry about whether what I am doing matters. I worry that I will have to work harder than I am. And there's not really any good reason to worry, because I have been trying to hold firm to the decision that I will not start working extended hours, because I don't want my life to look like that. Though, in some ways, I could do more, and feel better. What was that quote about worrying? If there's a situation, you have to first decide "Is there anything I can do?" If the answer is "Yes" then the next question is "Am I willing to do it?" If the answer is "No" to the first question, then there's no point in worrying. If the answer was "Yes" to the first question, and the answer is "Yes" to the second question, then, it would stand to reason, one should take action. If the answer is "No" to the second question, then, once again, there's no point in worrying, because you've made a choice. I find I spend too much time in my life saying "Yes" to the first question, "No" to the second question, and then choosing to worry and torture myself anyway.

I need to stop doing that.

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