30 May, 2012

Trying to make sense of the chaos

Today was Hatha with Diane.

Such a peaceful environment. Such a calming voice. Such a wonderful class.

Yet, around me, it feels like there is so much chaos and "non-sense." I am intentionally splitting that word down the middle. We so often use the word "nonsense" these days to connote "ridiculousness" or "bullshit" or other variations of flippancy. What I really mean is "non-sense:" that which just does not make sense (to me).

In class, we often hear instructors talk about how chaos is our perception; it is something in the mind. Things just are what they are, but they become chaos because we label or experience them that way through our filter of thinking. But I look in the world around me; heck, I look at Seattle these last few weeks, and I see violence and loss of life that is very difficult not to label. I know it's true that it's still a choice as to whether I point a finger and say "this is complete chaos" or take some other path.

How can we not label it?

But then I start thinking, "Is it really a good idea for me to be walking all around town, or taking the bus? Maybe it would be safer if I weren't doing that?" And that's where I realize why the labeling takes me down a bad path. If I believe that something bad is out there, and that I could conceivably take actions to avoid it, then all of a sudden, I am living from a place of fear. It's absolutely true that there are ill-advised things to do, from a standpoint of safety. But I don't want to close off. I don't want to not walk all around town because of some chance of something bad occurring. Something bad could occur anywhere, anytime, in any way. That's just the way life is.

But good things happen everywhere, all the time, in all sorts of ways too. To be fair, should I consider that to be chaos as well? Completely unpredictable goodness.

Bear with me... I'm going through a little "thing" this week.

Hatha today was indeed Hot. It was nice to take Diane's class again. It had been a while.

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