25 January, 2012

Great expectations

Today was Power Vinyasa with Whitney.

Yesterday's class taught me, once again, the importance of coming to each class without expectations. Yesterday, I had been looking forward to what I'd remembered as being a certain experience. And it was different. It was hotter, it was harder, and my mind got stuck in that measurement of discrepancy. It's an interesting phenomenon that I'm starting to realize. Every class is this organic balance between multiple factors: How do I feel today? How does the instructor feel today? What are the conditions in the room today? All of these can serve to shift the experience. And part of practice is to just be okay with whatever happens, and stay in that infinitesimally small sliver of time that is "this very moment."

I decided to go right back and do Whitney's class again. It was primarily due to schedule. I had a tight schedule, and I wanted to squeeze in a class, and 4pm was the only one that was going to work for me. And that was Whitney's class. I think that, under other circumstances, I might have shied away from going right back after the challenge. That's sort of how I tend to be. Though, I am trying to learn that I should confront these fears or apprehensions.

This class turned out to be world's different from yesterday. Who knows what the difference was? Yesterday, I felt like it should be over, and there was still more left. Today, in contrast, I was ready for more, and we were suddenly finished. I guess it is all about the expectation. I came in today knowing that I needed to be ready for a long, difficult class. I also knew that I needed to be ready for more than I might expect would be coming, and that she might surprise us by ramping down and then ramping up again near the middle to latter part of the class. So I was ready for it. And it never happened.

I am not sure if I am taking the right approach there. There's still an expectation. But it's a negative expectation, which led to a pleasant surprise. I don't really know. It's not like I spent the entire class thinking ahead to what she was going to do next. It was more of a vague awareness that anything could be coming.

I'm looking for a metaphor here.

No comments:

Post a Comment